Ugh.

I've been feeling like shit on and off for the past two days. I seriously don't know what it is. One minute I'm fine and feeling good, then out of nowhere I get into this horrible mood. I don't feel like I want to do anything, and everything I do seems contrived or boring. Take just now; I was down the pub with Will. We had one drink and played two games of pool. I had fun, I laughed at how bad I am at pool. Now we're home and I feel shit again. I 'feel' tired but I know I'm not tired.

Is this depression?

I guarantee I'll look at this again tomorrow and think 'I feel fine, why did I post this'.

Ugh....maybe this has something to do with a feeling of guilt I have right now. I don't want to have a girlfriend, but I seem to keep moving deeper and deeper into this thing with Lucy. She's really cool, and we have fun together, but I still don't want a girlfriend. How the fuck am I supposed to tell her that. It's almost like we're going out right now, it would be like a break up if I told her. How in the fuck did I get myself into this situation again so quickly.

Fuck my life.